Advice When Splitting Up
There are all sorts of reasons why people decide to break up, even after a long time together. There’s a nagging doubt in the back of your mind about whether this partner is right for you or not, but you don’t know for sure. Knowing when to part can be the most hardest part of a split up, so read on to spot the signs.
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•You Aren’t Right For Each Other : This can be simply nothing more than a personality difference – it isn’t anyone’s fault and you should tell him so. Maybe you got serious too soon over something that was never going to be more than a casual affair? If this really is the scenario, nipping things in the bud before they start getting heavier is the kindest thing you can do. The longer you leave it the more difficult it is going to get.
• You No Longer Fancy Them : Often aggravated if they still fancy you. Don’t keep putting it off, you need to realize that you might have to split. You don’t have to break their heart when you do this .
• You’ve Met Another : Don’t tell them if you don’t need to, and try not to rub it in their faces if it’s inevitable they will have to know. Stating there are too many differences between you to work would be a much easier prospect, than have them try and ‘compete’ against the new partner – or worse
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• They’ve Been Seeing Someone Else : This does make the parting of ways more straight forward, if you have found them lying to you about somebody else. But it is important not to go about this in a hysterical manner that is going to make them feel terrible – after all you have already decided, at this point, to finish things, so shouting the odds isn’t going to make anyone feel any better.
• You’re Not Sure You Can Cope With Them: Perhaps you adore your other half but you just don’t seem to be able to stop rowing. One minute you love them, the next you can’t stand the sight of them! If this is you it sounds as if you may need to think about your future together. It could possibly be that you need to take a step back and take things a little more gently. Some couples have more drama than others and this may simply be the case. If they are too high maintenance for your temperament, it is time to think about getting out.
• Are They Stringing You Along : Your partner is not looking willing to make the next logical step together after a fairly long period. This could be moving in, or a long term commitment i.e. Engagement or Marriage etc. You both owe it to each other to be honest about what you want from the other, if this is not the same, a split could be inevitable. Don’t keep your other half hanging on if you know they want a commitment that you will never give – put them out of their misery now.
In the end it is up to you to make the blow in the most humane way possible. You still need to remain strong though. Ideally you want to eliminate the opportunity for negotiation and being talked back into something you know is no longer viable, for everyone’s sake.
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