What makes you a good enemy?
Fighting or arguing is a part of any relationship. Conflict is inevitable for growth in your relationship. Even the strongest relationships can go through some tough times. Some relationships, if not carefully handled, can easily fall into pitfalls.
If you are in a big fight, you become an enemy in the eyes of your partner. Ask yourself: What kind of enemy I am?
Are you a good or bad enemy?
Do you avoid confrontation, escape from arguments or reject the opinion of you partner?
If you fighting your battles alone, fire against fire, or for your self-defense, or too lazy, proud or stubborn to admit things are not working right, that makes you a bad enemy.
A good enemy on the other hand, does not avoid any arguments. A good enemy listens and makes an effort to solve the conflict. If you have a strength of character and enough patience, you would be able to handle situations easily.
If you are able to do all of these, it simply shows that you are able to listen to the hidden content of the whole idea of arguing- you are able to determine what your partner is crying out for, the need for contact and the desperation for loneliness.
Signs of being a good enemy to your partner:
You always think about your partner’s feelings, if they feel good about themselves each day. - Be able to say an apology and break communication barriers - Praising your partner whenever they contributed something that helps your relationship - You acknowledge the problems in your relationship and helping you partner understand why it is important to discuss the problems. - You recognize and accept your shortcomings and think of ways for you to become a better partner - You treat your partner with respect and dignity at all times
You get caught in the stresses of daily living and dealing with a difficult partner makes it worse. but if you are able to deal with it, it shows that you have a skill of a good enemy.
The skills of a good enemy:
- Be able to accept the things that your partner find difficult in your relationship
- Deal with the problems in an calm and self-empowered manner
- Even if your partner can be difficult, you are able to focus the positive energy that enhances the relationship
- Be able to control your emotions, know when to stop and to say enough, and be able to make solid decisions
- Willingness Negotiate a win-win soluton with your partner
You should always work through problems and settle it in a cooperative way. After all, you and your partner thrive in a mutual understanding and peaceful atmosphere. Your goal must be clear, that fighting is not to make you a bad enemy, but rather the opposite.
Is your relationship beyond repair?
It may not be as bad as you think…as long as you still care.By applying the ideas we offer in the ebook, you will become a Positive Conflict agent, what I call being a “Good Enemy”!
Want to know more?
Neil Warner
Positive Conflicts
PS: Need Results fast?
Get your copy of ”The Art of Positive Conflicts“
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